The Purity Myth

Introduction
Sexual purity is a phrase that people use to mean the act of refraining from sexual
activities. Most people seek chastity for different reasons, the common one being that sex is an
ungodly deed, which should only take place in certain situations or according to particular laws
that religion or culture dictates. However, due to the varying customs, no universal standards
specify which sexual activities one should not engage in to be chaste. This is because morals are
the primary motivator to sexual purity, while at the same time, they are subjective. Nevertheless,
in most scenarios where sexual abstinence is the topic, people mean the non-involvement in
penetrative sex before marriage. Contrarily, to some religions like Christianity, chastity means
avoiding anything to do with sex, including thinking about it. This topic is therefore debatable,
especially to contemporary societies, who believe that virginity and purity is a façade that
people, predominantly women are guilted into believing (Horberg, Oveis, Keltner & Cohen,
2009). Through an analysis of the origin, spread and adoption of the sexual purity myth, this
paper proves that the purity myth is a social construct that has constantly communicated the false
message that identity, morality and worthiness of a woman is connected to her sexuality.
Origin of the purity myth
The exaggerated value of virginity, which is a word that people use interchangeably with
sexual purity, is drawn from many factors; one of them being the biblical teachings of the Virgin
Mary who according to Christians is the epitome of a woman with God’s favor (D’Avignon,
2016). To Christians and especially Roman Catholics who worship Mary and believe she is the
perfect example of righteousness and closeness to God, virginity is what sets apart women of
good character from the rest. This explains why Christianity advocates and teaches sexual purity

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among its believers. Furthermore, different verses in the Bible talk about the same issue all
drawing to the point that, to have a closer relationship with God, one should not engage in sex, or
in other words, one should remain sexually pure until marriage. For instance, Ephesians chapter
5, verses 3, says that a Christian should not have even a hint of sexual immorality as it makes
them impure. Therefore, the popularity of Christianity and the belief in Biblical teachings is the
primary factor that can be accredited for sparking off the sexual purity myth.
Another source of this virginity myth is the cultural beliefs from most parts of the world.
Most societies believe that the first sexual encounter a woman has is significant and should take
place under the institution of marriage. Just like in religion, societal values indicate that a woman
should’ keep’ herself for the husband who will be the first person to engage with sexually. With
this reasoning, people grow up with the belief that engaging in sex before marriage makes them
lose their value (Carpenter, 2001). Besides in most societies, when women have sex, they lose
their value, hence the reason why people use terms like deflowering and losing virginity to mean
first sexual experience.
For a long time now, various movements that encourage abstinence from sex before
marriage among women have come up in America. The most common one is the purity ball that
has been in existence since 1998. It is a dance occasion, which is attended by girls and their
fathers. The main aim of the event is to make girls pledge virginity to their fathers until they are
married (Moslener, 2015). With such activities, American women eventually end up believing in
the fantasized value of chastity. Therefore, such cultural occurrences are a source of this purity
delusion.

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The spread of the Sexual Purity Myth
The idea that a woman’s virginity is directly proportional to her value is common in most
parts of the world and almost all cultures. Surprisingly, even in the contemporary and forward-
thinking countries like America, people continue to spread this ideology in many different ways.
First, the government is at the forefront of this by funding sexual education that majorly
advocates for abstinence instead of safe sexual practices. Through such teachings in school, most
people learn about sex from the virginity movement perspective (Valenti, 2010). Therefore,
almost everyone who has gone to an American school knows that abstinence increases one’s
value.
The media is another way in which this false ideology is becoming more prevalent
(Cirian, 2019). First, there are commercials and television programs with the storyline of girls
going wild and becoming uncontrollable. Such videos serve the purpose of slut-shaming women
and spreading the idea that if a woman engages in sexual activities, she loses her value. Besides,
many YouTube videos and talks advocate for the ‘beauty of waiting’ through an approach that
depicts that the value of women is measured by the sexual activities she engages. Hence, as long
as people in film continue to give their opinions on why women should abstain, the purity myth
continues to become more popular.
Adoption of the Sexual Purity Myth
As much as the idea of sexual purity and the value society places on abstinence is
mythical, undoubtedly many people believe it. An example of how many people have adopted
this myth is through the recent development of medical techniques like hymen reconstruction.
This is a surgical procedure meant to return the hymen to its original place after activities like
sexual intercourse ruptured it (Cook & Dickens, 2009). Most women who undergo this

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procedure are motivated by cultural practices, which devalue women who do not prove their
virginity when they get married. The process is deceptive, as it cannot be proven scientifically.
However, women still use it to prevent losing their dignity. Another way through which people
have adopted this ideology is evident due the backlash that family planning has in most
countries. There have been constant efforts to ban the morning-after pill since critiques argue
that it promotes irresponsibility among women (Valenti, 2010). These efforts serve to restrict
women on what to do with their bodies. It also shames women who may want to use birth control
methods as society views them as people without value. Therefore, many women are likely to
shy away from contraception as it makes them look ‘cheap.’
Additionally, most societies have adopted the purity myth through how they treat
commercial sex workers. In most conservative countries, prostitution is illegal (“Sex work and
the law – it’s complicated,” 2017). Such societies view sex workers as lesser human beings
because they are actively engaging in sex for money. This means that people have accepted the
idea that how many men a woman sleeps with determine her value. Thus, few respect women in
this line of work. The final way which people have adopted the virginity myth is through using
women’s sexual activities to troll or shame them. To many cultures, a good woman should not
have sex before marriage; thus, anyone who goes against this notion is termed as one without
value, and one who does not deserve respect or success. This explains why pop stars with
sexualized public images like the Kardashians are less credited for their accomplishments.
Verily, whatever they do, the public always criticizes them for being overly sexual women.
Conclusion
The purity myth is a false idea that women’s sexuality determines who they are and what
value they hold. It has been in existence for many years now, and surprisingly, contemporary

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cultures are still holding on to it. The idea is entirely non-factual, and it only serves to restrict
women. Some movements and events like the virginity movement and the purity ball are
responsible for the widespread of this ideology in the American culture. As much as it is an
inaccurate theory, most cultures have adapted it, and this is evident in how openly sexual women
are treated. Therefore, it is evident that society places women’s value in their sex life. Despite
the many efforts to change this narrative, it seems that most cultures determine whether a woman
is valuable by checking her sexual history. This position is very backward, and people should
work to change it. That is why feminist movements are actively fighting to get liberated from
this myth as it limits women. It is thus necessary for society to discredit the exaggerated value
that women are given based on their abstinence status. It is high time that women, just like men,
start being respected for essential things like accomplishments, and not mere sexual choices.

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References

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in the united states. Journal Of Sex Research, 38(2), 127-139. doi:
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Cirian, N. (2019). The Talk: Society’s skewed perception of virginity tied to media, education.
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virginity-incels-elliot-roger-media-sexuality/article_74607f1a-5731-11e9-8c35-
d7309e72ff7a.html
Cook, R., & Dickens, B. (2009). Hymen reconstruction: Ethical and legal issues. International
Journal Of Gynecology & Obstetrics, 107(3), 266-269. doi: 10.1016/j.ijgo.2009.07.032
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